Kinda Numbing

Not sure what is going on today... maybe its the weather, maybe it's Matt's leaving, maybe its the baking, who know, but I am feeling a bit numb.
I keep saying that I am ready for this week and I know that I can never be fully ready for it. Even though I know that as the time goes by that I am only that much closer to getting to move back to Oregon and then that much closer to R&R and then finally next year the end of the deployment. I am not afraid for Matt's safety, I know that God will be with him as well as Tyler. I am just not looking for the time apart, we haven't even had a year together yet. I know that is comes with the job, deployments, schools, training, etc. And really small times apart I believe are healthy, we appreciate one another so much more. I am hoping that God's plan for us is also what we are planning. We are really hoping to be back on the west coast, I don't care if that is Recruiting or going back to Lewis. I just hate life feeling so up in the year. I really want to feel like the kids have stability. I guess that is my biggest issue. I want them to be in a school for more than a year. I also know how hard it is for me to have people in my life come and go so often and even though kids do it so much easier than us adults, its still not easy.
This blog is totally unorganized and sounds like I am complaining, I'm not, just trying to say all of it and not knowing how.


You can kiss your family and friends good-bye and put miles between you, but at the same time you carry them with you in your heart, your mind, your stomach, because you do not just live in a world but a world lives in you.